Define Normal

Christmas is over.

2012 is here.

We're into mid-January already ... a time when college students return for the spring semester. As many other BU parents do, we loaded up the car and headed into Boston to drop her off.

Jim: How did it go?
Me: Fine. She's all set. Time to get back to normal.

Wait! What? Did I really say that? Since when did my empty nest fall into the "normal" category? Oh my!

Flashback to mid-December where she came home for Christmas break. Within hours her backpack, shoes (multiple pairs), headphones, laptop, etc. were strewn across the family room, kitchen, stairs and into her bedroom. It's insanity!

And barely a month later, it's all packed up and loaded in the car. No more signs of my youngest strewn about the house. Am excited for her as she heads back to begin her spring semester as a junior (how did that happen so fast?). Very excited about the upcoming softball season and all that is ahead there.

And yet, I find myself a bit melancholy to know that it will be late May or even June before I get the chance to trip over her shoes, refold the blanket she used or hear her phone go off during dinner. In the big scheme of life, it's not that long and I'll certainly see her as her biggest fan in the stands at softball games. But home is not the same without the energy she brings. Each of my girls adds a different element to the life in our home. It's just not really home without them both here.

I've come to accept the new norm. We are definitely back to normal. The grocery bill decreases again. Laundry is done in 1.5 loads vs. four. No more "Friends" episodes.

Am surprised at myslef that I'm able to find the joy in this new norm. I certainly miss what was. It was glorious. But, normal is becoming comfortable. And it's ok.

"I believe the key to happiness is: someone to love, something to do, and something to look forward to."  

Elvis Presley

All of that is true even with an empty nest. Life is good. :)

A New Love

Last year, my New Year's resolution was to start a blog about my journey as an empty-nest mom. I was definitely an emotional ride, but I do believe I've come through it a better person and mom. I love my adult daughters ... no surprise there ... but I also love being the mom of adult daughters ... finally. I think this blog was the first resolution I've ever kept the whole year. Yay me!

And now it's 2012.

Riding on the success of 2011's resolution, I'm gonna give this another shot. 2012 is going to be about me and food. I have a love-hate relationship with food and it's time to face it head on.

Over the years, the busy life of raising children and all that goes with it changed my love of cooking to a chore. Something to do to make sure the girls were nourished ... or more like ... something to not do as there just wasn't time as we ran from one event to the next.

But we don't have to do that anymore. And I've slowly begun to look at the spices in my cabinet with a renewed interest. And then came Wegmasn. I LOVE WEGMANS. Oh ... silly me. I'm not on a mountain top so no need to shout, but if I were, I'd have to scream that out. :D

Wegmans has a full aisle of gluten-free foods. On their grand opening day, Jim and I were there and I cannot lie ... I cried when I found that aisle. Food, real food ... that won't make me sick. Real food where I can actually trust the ingredients list or the label. It's definitely tear-worthy.

This is just one shot of what seems like hundreds of different cheeses. Who knew there were so many? It makes me want to try a different one each week. :D

And look at this picture from one of the many produce aisles at Wegmans. So colorful! Can veggies be beautiful? I think so! It's so exciting to see all the options.

For medical reasons, I find myself needing to really modify what I eat. Have been doing it for a while now with the gluten-free stuff so watching carbs is just more labels to read.

It's with a healthier 2012 in mind and the amazing selection at Wegmans that I find myself wanting to cook for fun again. So, the menu the other day was steak, butternut squash (first time ever) and roasted brussel sprouts.

We've never tried butternut squash before, but let me tell you that cooking them with butter and a little maple syrup is phenom! And the brussel sprounts ... cooked in a skillet with olive oil and garlic. Absolutely delicious!

If you haven't explored Wegmans yet, I encourage you to do so. As I discover new recipes and foods, I hope to share them with you. You traveled with me as I learned to face an empty nest. I hope you'll stay with me as my nest continues to rearrange itself where food is concerned.

$50/Week on Groceries? Yep!

When Jim lost his job back in March, to say we had a small sense of panic is an understatement. It left us with his weekly unemployment check, a shadow of his former paycheck, and my part-time job with Disney. So many things went through my head as I tried to figure out how we would pay the mortgage, the bills and eat. Eating a gluten-free diet isn't the cheapest way to eat ... or so I thought.

I've been asked many times since March how we managed to eat, and eat well on only $50/week. That's all our remaining funds could handle and still afford the litany of things life demands. Budgeting took on a whole new sense of urgency.

Now that he's employed again, we have eased up a bit, but still choose to allot $50/week for groceries supplemented with a once a month shopping spree of about $100. Gone are the days of stockpiling food in the pantry and freezer. We're just the two of us now and a full cabinet is money. When living check-to-check and week-by-week, 10 cans of tomato sauce could easily translate into a couple dollars of gas to get us through. Crazy, but when funds are limited, we had to change how we looked at everything.

It's an adventure. That's the positive spin I put on it to keep myself from going crazy with worry. We now get kind of excited over finding really good deals at the grocery store. One of the best Jim found was a decent-sized ham (think holiday size) for only $.29. Yep! It was priced incorrectly ... obviously ... but the manager let him have it for that. We were so excited and I can't tell you how many meals we got out of that ham all the way down to pea soup using the bone. :D

Today Jim went up to Stop & Shop and came home with almost $40 of meat for $20! Imagine the excitement to know we just got six meals for $20! We'll make soup with one of the chickens which will really stretch this to more than six meals. This alone comes out to about $3/meal for the meat. Fortunately we have other stuff in the freezer to mix up the protein a little more, but this is exciting!

To make it even better, if you look at the receipt you'll see that our savings totaled more than our actual cost. Whoohoooo! Now we have $30 left for vegetables, etc.

Unfortunately, Stop & Shop doesn't have the best prices on all things. That's another thing we learned during our unemployment ordeal. 

Our grocery shopping day starts with the meats that are on sale at Stop & Shop. We then head to PriceRite in Worcester for the biggest portion of our shopping. While not the fanciest place, and ya hafta bag your own groceries (but who cares about that), the prices are unbeatable. On most items, their prices beat S&S.

While the fresh produce is priced well below S&S and is a good purchase, their fruit tends to spoil quickly. While a good price, unless you're eating it within a day or two of purchase, it's a waste of money. We have recently decided to not buy fruit from PriceRite any more and now go to the fresh produce stand. A&R on Worcester Street rocks.

We also hit the Dollar store for some items. So our grocery trip looks like this --

1) Stop & Shop (Grafton) for sale meats.
2) Dollar Tree (Worcester) for various items.
3) Price Rite (Worcester) for veggies, bread, milk, pasta, potatoes, etc.
4) A&R (Worcester) for fresh fruit.

Prior to any of this, we make a menu for the week so we don't go shopping without having a clue of what's needed.

If I got into couponing, I'm certain we could save even more. For now, we're quite happy with where we are. For those that have asked, hope this helps. For those that didn't, hope you got something from it. :)

Babies Don't Keep

I hope my child looks back on today
And sees a mother who had time to play.
There will be years for cleaning and cooking,
But children grow up when you’re not looking.
Tomorrow I’ll do all the chores you can mention
But today, my baby needs time and attention.
So settle down cobwebs; dust go to sleep,
I’m cuddling my baby, and babies don’t keep.

I don't know who wrote this. A quick search only showed me others who don't know who wrote this. :D 

I read this in my early days as a new mom learning to juggle the demands of a baby born with many medical needs, a wife of less than two years and a career. Some wise person either shared it with me or I read it somewhere. My apologies if it was shared as I so don't remember, but I seriously believe I read it in some guru-like parenting magazine. This was long before the Internet put everything at a click.

So much comfort in this little poem. It actually soothed my worries and helped me come to terms with the realization that some things were more important than a clean house. It helped me see that it's OK that there were toys on the floor ... laundry in the baskets ... beds not made and ... :::gasp::: dirty dishes in the sink.

Fast forward through the 25+ years of raising two daughters and all that goes with an active family life and career to today. 

There are no more babies to distract me. It's time to follow through. Chores is such a negative word. Growing up, chores were handed down as punishment by my own parents. 

Some how, some way my view of "chores" has changed. It's part of this morphing I've been doing lately I think. 

Before, chores were something that had to be squeezed into a day that had no room for more. Now, it's really quite easy to do something around the house each day and still have plenty of time to do whatever it is empty nesters do ... read, enjoy the outdoors ... write a blog. :D

So dust and cobwebs, thank you for waiting. It's your turn now and what's even more weird is ... I don't detest is as much as I thought I would. Go figure.

This is Garbage!

On my way to Boston yesterday, I stopped at Dunkin' Donuts to get an iced coffee. Nothing out of the ordinary right?

I pull up to the drive-thru and handed over my debit card. OK ... why I paid $2.86 with anything other than cash is for another day. :D

Back to the window ... we make the exchange ... debit card for straw. I remove the paper from the straw and attempt an exchange of debit card for paper. She takes the straw paper and ...

throws it on the ground.

I'm appalled. "Are you kidding me? Did you just throw the trash on the ground"?

Attitude.

As she hands me my iced coffee, I ask again, "Did you really just throw the trash on the ground?"

"We aren't allowed to take anything from you."

Me: "Then just tell me that instead of littering."

Driving away, I think of tons of other things I could have said. There's a part of me that understands why they don't want to take everyone's trash. It is Grafton after all and I imagine businesses have to pay for trash just like the rest of us. But come on! Throwing it on the ground?

I'm still incensed over this as I enter the Mass Pike and what happens? The car in front of me throws trash out the window!

What the heck?! Twice in one day? Do these folks not remember the commercial with the Native American with the tear rolling down his cheek?

The paper from a straw is just a small thing. But come on ... we know how quickly the little things pile up.

:::getting off my soap box:::

Old Mother Hubbard's Not-So-Bare Cupboard

"Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cupboard,
To give the poor dog a bone:
When she came there,
The cupboard was bare,
And so the poor dog had none."

So that's the nursery rhyme as we all know it. Here's my version --

Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cupboard,
To give the poor dog a bone:
When she came there,
The cupboard was so crammed full of cups and glasses that there wasn't any room for a bone

And so the poor dog had none.

This photo is a picture of my cups and glasses cabinet. Now seriously, how many cups and glasses do we need? There are only two of us. Occasionally Jayme will come home for a night or two, but certainly she won't need this many! And when Sara and Joe come by, we might use a couple more than normal, but certainly not this many. We aren't that thirsty!

I admit that when we go on vacation or visit a cool place, I like to buy a mug from that place. Even taking that into account, there are just way too many cups, mugs and glasses collected over the years and some just have to go. 

We are making room for Sara and Joe to move in for a bit. Ayup, the nest is being rearranged again. :D This is a good thing and it's the reason I'm looking at this cabinet and going "what the heck." 

I'm proud to say that this cabinet is now completely empty. We've selected those drinking vessels that we like the most ... which, of course, begs the question why do we have favorite cups to drink from? Does the drink of choice taste better from a favorite cup vs. one that has fallen out of favor? I digress.

The cups/glasses/mugs that made the cut now reside in a different cabinet leaving this one open for Sara and Joe.

It's interesting how the simple act of cleaning out one cabinet screams out for more of the same in the rest of the kitchen. Game on.

A Photo Fourth

Family

Fun

New Friend

Relaxation

Amazing

Baseball

Daughter

Granddog

Good eatin'

Gluten free

Antagonist

Boston Pops

1812

Celebration